Thursday, August 27, 2015
What is perfect to you? Is it a home that is so clean you could eat off the floor? Is it white couches and crisp, clean decor? Is it when your hair and make up is flawless? Is it looking like your family just stepped out of an ad for Polo? Is it nothing but smiles and laughter? Odds are that if your answer is yes you aren't alone. In a world that's so social media driven it's very easy to look at someone's Instagram account, Blog, Facebook page or the other hundreds of social media sites and think to yourself "I need to be more like her. She's got it all together."
I'm just as guilty of thinking those things and often times, of being the one who posts those pictures because I fall into the trap of thinking these things define me. My phone has told me, more than once, storage is full, because i'm busy taking 100 pictures of the same thing just to get that one perfect shot. In my adult life i've found myself striving to perfection, even though, I was raised to believe the only perfect in the world is God. I know i'm not perfect, life isn't, nothing is so i'm trying to give that image in my head up.
My car is dirty. There's bird poop on the outside and enough dirt inside I could make my own baseball pitching mound.
My house needs to be dusted, the kitchen needs to be mopped, the carpets need to be vacuumed.
Currently i'm just wearing nylon work out shorts and an Under Armour tee shirt.
My engagement ring is being repaired meaning I won't have it for my Bachelorette party Saturday.
There are clothes that need to be folded.
Thank You notes to be written.
Insurance to be taken care of.
And my wedding only 29 days away.
Normally all those things would have sent me in a tizzy (yes, that's a Southern term meaning fit) because there are a lot of things that need to be done in order to make "perfect" happen in my world today yet here I sit. At my desk, laptop in hand. The only light I have is the sun from the window + my marquee letters, & a candle burning. I'm listening to Point of Grace, and ignoring the rest of the world because this is what I need at this moment.
See, perfect is different for everybody & this is perfect to me at this moment. It's what my heart & soul needs. It's where I feel like I need to be in order to be the best of myself. This week has been a rollercoaster and I've gotten off track. This is what I need to be able to give the best of myself to those who need it and believe me, i've not been giving it this week. Trust me when I say, i'm not perfect and I don't strive for some impossible belief of what I think perfection is.
I roll my eyes.
I huff and puff.
I get teary eyed over the stupidest things.
95% of the time I don't want to deal with people.
I get frustrated with my son for acting just like me (your wish already came true Mom).
But it's life and it's messy and it's not perfect and that's okay. It's okay that I don't have it all together. That i'm not head of the PTO, looking like Barbie Mom, losing my identity in my child or spouse. It's okay that I roll my eyes and huff and puff because at least there's something going on in that brain of mine. It's okay to cry over the stupid things and it's okay for wanting to hide away in my own little world. At least we're all nice in here. And it's okay that my son acts like me because I can relate to him.
It's time we all stop striving for an image of perfection based off someone else's Instagram account. It's time we define perfect for ourselves and strive towards that. Of course, you have to be kind to yourself in your thoughts of perfection and know we aren't Wonder Woman so what can be put off until tomorrow can wait.
I leave you this this question..what is your idea of perfection?
For me, it's simple. Perfection is sheer and utter happiness.
It's the moment my fiancee walks in the door from work and wraps his arms around me.
It's moments like these. Just me, my lap top, good music, candles, and an hour of devotionals.
It's doing something nice for someone else like sending my in laws a meal.
It's snuggling in on Sunday nights with my guys to watch some t.v.
It's the morning drives taking my son to school where we talk, heart to hearts.
It's the silly little squirrel that has taken to peaking in the windows when she wants peanuts.
Sure, some days perfection is other things but perfection for me is always happiness.